Making Friends With The Enemy
by boshrocks
Summary: Dumbledore comes up with a way to get the Gryffindor Golden Trio communicating with the Slytherin Silver Trio. i suck at summeries...it's way better than it sounds, i promise. reviewers are always welcome.
1. Chapter 1

"What the hell is going on?" Ron asked in extreme annoyance as they were shoved into the great hall by Hagrid.

Hagrid didn't answer the trio, only shoved a letter into Harry's hand before slamming the doors shut.

"We think Dumbledore has something to do with it."

Turning they saw Draco Malfoy, Pansy Parkinson and Blaise Zambini sitting on one of the tables lazily. The Gryffindors went to sit on the parallel table to them.

"Harry give me that letter." Hermione ordered. "Dear Harry, Ron, Draco, Blaise, Hermione and Pansy." She read aloud.

"How come they put us girls last?" Pansy pouted.

"Never mind that." Hermione turned back to the letter. "Seeing as relations between the six of you are still not improved we have decided that you have to get to know each other better. You will stay in here for two days. We think it unbelievable that you can survive a war together but you still can't stand to be civil to each other. Yes you are in rival houses but this has got to stop. You aren't that different from each other and we believe you have the potential to be good friends. Food will be provided. Yours affectionately, Albus Dumbledore and Minerva McGonagall."

"Put me down for a big I Told You So." Draco said. Hermione looked up at him and glared.

"We have to get along with them?" Ron and Blaise said together pointing at each other.

"Hermione, do you think we should let them know now?" Pansy asked.

"Hm, okay, couldn't hurt. Guys, we have a confession."

"We're already friends."

"Come again?" Draco looked blankly between them.

"Pansy is my best girl friend. We hang out and study together all the time. You're just too dense to notice it."

"Gossip about you lot in the bathrooms. Be each others ears in the common rooms."

"How do you do that?"

"Hang on, what time is it?" Hermione grabbed Harry's wrist and checked his watch. "Let's show them. Three, two, one." Before their eyes Hermione turned into Pansy and Pansy turned into Hermione.

"What the hell!" all the boys shouted.

"Status report." Hermione said.

"Ron has a girlfriend who shall remain nameless at the present time and yup you were right Harry fancies you." Pansy said chuckling and getting off the table. "How about on your end?"

"Draco's sexuality has been called into question and Blaise still believes in Father Christmas." Hermione reported getting down from the Slytherin table and meeting Pansy halfway.

"You mean I just asked Parkinson out?" Harry said looking severely shocked and annoyed.

"I do not believe in Father Christmas!"

"I am not gay!"

"Who says I have a girlfriend?"

"I'd say, mission well and truly accomplished." Hermione smirked at Pansy who sniggered.

"How long has this been going on?" Draco asked.

"About three years." Hermione said.

"Sometimes it takes Slytherin cunning to gain a confidence."

"And Gryffindor's charm can, on some occasions, discover things that most people wouldn't guess. After all, no one ever suspects the quiet ones."

They got back on the tables beside their friends.

"We take each others place all the time. And you never realised the difference, because our characters are so similar and we know how to be each other. But, we don't only do that. Right Hermione?"

"Oh indeed. We are quite busy, the pair of us. We have a constant supply of polyjuice potion and we can spy all we want. I also invented an invisibility potion so I wouldn't need to keep borrowing your cloak. We also live quite near each other and took acting classes together during the holidays and we're good at observing people and copying their mannerisms."

"Hermione this is a whole new side of you that I have never seen before." Harry said incredulously. "How come you never told us about this?"

"You never asked. We know everything that goes on at this school. Everything about our friends, our enemies, even our teachers. We might turn this into a business when we leave next year."

"It's a lot of fun. We have dirt on everybody. We know everybody's weak spots."

"What dirt do you have on the teachers?" Blaise asked curiously.

"McGonagall is not her last name. Her name is Mrs Minerva Dumbledore." Hermione smirked at Pansy who snorted with laughter,

"No way!"

"Yes way. And I know that Snape was, and still is, in love with Lilly Potter." Pansy smiled at Harry who paled.

"Snape was in love with my mother?"

"Yes. Imagine what would have happened if she had married him instead of James."

The all thought about it for a moment. Then, as one, they shuddered.

"Doesn't bear thinking about." Harry said looking thoroughly disgusted at the thought.

"You might be in Slytherin if that had happened." Draco said earning a glare from Hermione and Ron.

"Yeah right." Ron scoffed.

"Like I'd ever chose Slytherin to be my house." Harry scowled.

"Although…"

"Hermione I do not like that although!"

"What's the although part?" Pansy asked.

Hermione drew her away from the boys and further down the hall. A moment later Pansy squealed and then whispered something to Hermione, who also squealed.

"Girls." Ron muttered.

"I hear you." Blaise said grinning.

"Harry, I can't believe you nearly…" Hermione clamped her hand over Pansy's mouth to stop the words.

Harry's mouth dropped open. "Hermione I hate you!"

"No you don't, you love me." Hermione smirked.

Harry blushed. "Who says I do?"

"She does." Hermione pointed at Pansy.

Ron glared at Harry. "I have to compete with you for her?"

"Who says I fancy either of you?"

"Who do you fancy?" Pansy asked her friend.

"No one." Pansy noticed Hermione glanced at Draco as she spoke.

Pansy's mouth dropped open. "Really?"

"You saw that?"

"You know me, I notice everything."


	2. Chapter 2

The boys watched the girls eating further down the table. Between nine o'clock and lunch they had managed to insult the girls four times and had three arguments between them and each other.

"Look at them, so smug over there." Ron said.

"Why won't they just talk to us?" Blaise complained.

"Because you were the idiot that called them fashion plates." Draco rounded on him. Harry couldn't help realising that Blaise was a lot like Ron and, even more scarily, that Draco was like him.

"I wasn't the one who said the girls were losers."

"Actually I said they were hot losers."

"Draco, that's hardly any better."

"Like you're really the genius in this friendship."

"Oh my god! I said that to you last week!" Harry hissed at Ron. Further down the table they heard the girls snort with laughter.

"Think they're realising it yet?" Hermione said conversationally to Pansy.

"What?"

"Noodle. You're as dense as Ron sometimes!"

"Hey! There's no need for that. That's about the worst sort of insult you could use."

"I know, I'm sorry Pans. I just meant to say that I don't think the boys have realised how like each other they actually are."

"I know. Ron and Blaise are practically the same person. Scarily enough."

"And once Draco got over his muggle thing, he and Harry turned out to be very similar in character."

"I know, weird isn't it?"

"Very." Hermione grinned and then sniggered.

"Harry go apologise for both of us."

"Why me?" Harry asked Ron.

"Cos I'm bound to mess it up. you heard what I said to them."

"What? That Hermione had my firebolt stuck up her bum twenty-four seven and that she'd had her sense of humour surgically removed?"

"Yeah, that. You know me, I'll just end up insulting her again if I try and apologise. Besides, you need to apologise to her too."

"Hm, I probably shouldn't have called her a social reject, huh?"

"Yeah, wasn't your finest hour."

"What would you say is my finest hour?" Harry smirked smugly.

"They should be worshipping me anyway." Draco said at the same time.

"Oh Merlin, you are so full of it!" Ron and Blaise shouted making the girls snigger again.

Draco and Harry looked at each other with precisely the same expression on their faces. A kind of mingled amusement and confusion.

Then the shock of realisation hit them both. Their mouths dropped open and they pointed at each other and gasped.

Pansy started giggling and then Hermione stifled a snort. Then Pansy laughed outright and Hermione joined her. Neither could stop for a full ten minutes.

"Took you guys long enough." Hermione spluttered through her laughter.

"Yeah, we've known for years." Pansy said as her giggles subsided.

…pause.

"Known what?" Ron said.

This time the girls fell off their seats laughing.


	3. Chapter 3

"This is impossible." Hermione said to Pansy. "They'll never get on."

"I don't know about that." Pansy replied as they watched the boys fighting. "They're quarrelling like an old married couple."

Hermione snorted. "We have to do something about them. I dread to think what Dumbledore would do to us if this doesn't work."

Hedwig fluttered into the hall as she spoke. She delivered a letter to Hermione before flying out again.

"What's that?" Pansy asked. The boys hadn't noticed.

Hermione opened the letter and read it through. She laughed in disbelief. "Dumbledore is officially crazy."

"No surprise there. So what's it say?"

"Here's a little something to help establish some friendly feelings between the two houses. I feel that if you knew a lot more about each other you would get on a lot better. A few surprises about each other may inspire a détente, perhaps even closer friendship." Hermione read.

"What's he asked us to do?"

"That old codger has asked us to play 'I never'. Eight turns, so four each."

"'I never'? Like that's gonna help."

"It might. You guys don't know our secrets and even Harry and Ron don't know some of mine. Do Draco and Blaise know all of yours?"

"God no. But I thought I knew all of yours?"

"Not quite. Just like I don't know all yours. Boys!"

No one listened.

"Boys!" Hermione shouted again.

Still they continued to fight.

"I think this calls for two lungs." Pansy said.

"BOYS!" they yelled together.

That shut the boys up.

"Thank you." Hermione said shortly. "Dumbledore suggests a game of 'I never' to get to know each other better. Shall we start? I think you've fought for long enough. Sit down and we'll start."

They sat on the benches and chairs on one table facing each other and a dozen butterbeer bottles appeared on the table between them. They each took one and decided that the Slytherins would start them off.

"I'll start slow because of you goody Gryffindors who never misbehave." The Gryffindors in question snorted with laughter and Draco looked very confused. "I have never got a piercing somewhere that isn't my ear." He waggled the little dragon tooth dangling from his left ear.

All three Gryffindors and Pansy drank, much to Draco's surprise.

"Where are you pierced?" he asked them curiously.

"Do we really have to show you?" Hermione frowned. Draco nodded so she stuck out her tongue and showed the long stud down the middle of it. She then stood and raised her shirt showing the belly button ring. "I also have one more, but I'm not showing that one."

"Really?" Ron said.

"You have another one?" Harry asked.

"Yeah. It's the same place as yours." She retorted making Harry and Ron blush.

"Where's his?"

Harry unbuttoned his shirt and showed the small ring through his nipple. Ron then did the same.

"Hermione you have one through your nipple?" Blaise asked.

"It's not like it hurt." Pansy said.

"You have one there too?" Draco asked.

Pansy nodded. "Contrary to my reputation I have never had sex." It surprised everyone when Hermione, Ron and Harry drank when Draco did.

"Hermione you've had sex?"

"Yeah. Surprising isn't it."

"And that's all we need to say about it." Harry said quickly.

"You two?"

"No!" Hermione squealed. "I don't actually know who he is. It was in a dark closet and I didn't recognise his voice. I vaguely remember glasses and messy hair. He also had a scar…on his forehead!! It was you!" Hermione shouted at Harry as the realisation hit her.

"I knew it was you in the closet. I'm sorry for not saying anything before. Just bear in mind that I was completely in love with you at the time."

"Dude, even I wouldn't stoop that low to get Hermione." Draco said.

"Ron has obviously slept with Luna and Draco sleeps around anyway." Hermione said still looking angry with Harry.

"I have never had a tattoo done." Blaise said. Once again the trio drank as did Pansy and Draco.

"Hermione again. You really aren't as demure as you appear." Draco said looking pleasantly surprised.

"I actually have more than one tattoo." She stood up and turned around raising her shirt revealing a red and gold Gryffindor lion at the base of her spine. She then lifted her hair and showed a Chinese symbol on the back of her neck. She turned and rolled down her sock to reveal a butterfly on her ankle and a lizard on her upper arm. Finally she drew her shirt back revealing a phoenix above her right breast.

"We have similar." Harry and Ron turned around and showed that they too had a Chinese symbol on the back of their necks.

"What do they mean?" Pansy asked curiously.

"Mine means Wisdom, Harry's Bravery, and Ron's Loyalty." Hermione said. "Our three best traits. They also have the Gryffindor lion and the phoenix."

They got up and Harry shrugged off his shirt to reveal the phoenix on his left shoulder blade and the lion on his right upper arm. Ron had the lion on his forearm and the phoenix on his upper arm.

"Pansy what's yours?" Draco asked looking shocked that the Gryffindors had tattoos.

"I have the lizard same as Hermione. It's our disguise chameleon. And yours is your dragon one, for your namesake."

"I have never seen my best friends naked." Blaise said. All three Gryffindors drank again as did Pansy.

"Did you have to bring that up?" Hermione frowned.

"You've seen each other naked?" Draco said sniggering.

"They walked in on me changing at the Burrow." Hermione shrugged.

"She got us back and shut us outside in the snow nude." Harry said.

"And Hermione and I always see each other without clothes on."

Everyone except Hermione stared at Pansy with mouths gaping open. Hermione blushed a little.

"When?" Harry managed.

"Bath night. After we've spied on people we need to wash up so we go to the prefects bathroom and scrub up and give our reports. What? You try turning into a member of the opposite sex."

"Yeah, guys are disgusting. We feel horrible afterwards." Pansy added.

"Our turn. Shall I start?"

"Yeah, I'd like to know what you haven't done." Draco said approvingly.

"I have never gone to other houses dorms." Her friends drank as did Blaise and Pansy.

"I know why we've gone to other dorms, but when did you?" Pansy asked curiously.

"I go to my girlfriends all the time. She's in Gryffindor."

"Who is she?" Ron asked. "How come we've never seen you sneaking in and out?"

"Polyjuice potion. And my girlfriend is your sister."

"Ginny!" the others exclaimed.

"I have never given a blow job." Harry said to change the subject, since Ron looked ready to explode. Both girls drank.

"You had to didn't you?" Hermione glared at her friend.

"What? It was the best night of Ron's life."

"Hermione you gave him one?"

"I am going to murder Fred and George one of these days."

"They gave you the sweet too then?" Pansy asked sympathetically.

"I have never snogged a member of the same sex." Ron said with a snide look at Harry.

"One day I really will murder you." Harry growled as he drank, noting that all the others did too. "Since you're gonna ask anyway I might as well tell you. I kissed George in a game of truth or dare."

"Same for me except I kissed him." Draco said pointing at Blaise.

"What he said." Blaise looked sickened.

"Who've you kissed Hermione?" Ron asked.

"Pansy, Parvati…and Ginny."

"You kissed Ginny?" Ron and Blaise said together.

"Well someone had to teach me how to kiss, and I wasn't going to come to either of you."

"So that's what you were doing when you two hid in her room during the holidays." Harry said, looking very surprised.

"Are you done drooling over that? Last round. I have never made out on the library."

Harry, Draco and Blaise drank.

"I took Ginny completely by surprise in there." Blaise chuckled to himself.

"I would have thought you would make out in the library Hermione." Draco asked.

"Are you kidding?" Ron said. "The library is sacred to her."

"Yeah, it's like a temple for her." Harry interjected.

"A temple of learning."

"Thank you boys." Hermione said sternly, then she grinned. "So, looks like it's you who are the goody two shoes, not us." she told Draco smirking in a way which he thought was very sexy. "We oh so innocent Gryffindors have less in our bottles than all of you Slytherins. Well, not Pansy, because she's done almost everything I have."

"What haven't I done that you have?"

"You haven't had full lesbian sex, so far as I know. And you haven't been felt up by two guys at once in the quidditch changing rooms."

"When did that happen?" Pansy asked.

"Did you two do that?" Blaise asked Harry and Ron.

"No! We would never!"

"Yeah, she'd castrate us if we even attempted to." Harry said. "Wait, who did feel you up in there?"

"Fred and George. But I will get them back for it."

"Please don't tell me you had lesbian sex with Ginny." Ron shuddered.

"Her and Parvati. At the same time." Hermione smirked again and all the boys' mouths dropped open again. "See, I'm not nearly as innocent as I look, wouldn't you agree

Pansy?"

"Oh yes darling." Pansy winked at her.

"Are you sure you're not a lesbian Hermione?" Harry said.


End file.
